Heroes
Posted on: Thursday, February 08, 2007
Posted at: 1:27 AM
Posted at: 1:27 AM
Been staying home these couple of days. Catching up on sleep and TV programs. Still a little not used to it.
Now that I'm no longer with 987 it seems weird. Very weird. Feeling kinda lost actually. It's just such a sudden change. From early mornings, running around places, days fully planned... to absolutely no plans, no work, nothing.
Yeap... am not a part of 987 anymore. I never was.
I'm not too sure why they didn't keep me. Maybe cos' I suck... I suck... and I suck. That's wack!
Been watching Heroes. I've got episodes 1 to 13. And it's been an awesome show.
Does everyone really have an ability to make a difference in the world? I've always wanted to save the world. But I know I can't do it alone. But sadly, I'm always alone. And in times of desperate measures, I don't have a choice but to go with it. On. My. Own.
In every lifetime, there'll definitely be someone who stands out. Someone who can do something different and unique, touching lives and changing destiny. What can I do? What am I meant to do?
I've been asking myself. What do I want to do in my life. What do I want to spend the rest of my life doing. I then realized... I don't have an answer. I used to have. Now I've lost it.
I feel like I'm just living my life for the sake of living it. The feeling sucks. I can't seem to find myself back.
I know I can do great things. I can make a difference. Just like the special ones in Heroes. I can change time, I can use my mind to move things, I can not feel the pain, I can become someone else... I can do many things.
I can be a great DJ, I can make it big, I can be the one who stand out, I can be someone worth so much, I can be a script writer, I can be a journalist.... Why can't I do that? Cos' no one's gonna give me the chance to prove it. And no one will believe me.
Confidence dipping by a landslide, losing the ability to think... I turn to the TV for answers, hoping that it'll somehow change the way my mind's thinking.
From the movie Honey, 'Sometimes you have to get in through the back door first if you wanna get in through the front'
I'm doing that. But even the back door's locked now. And breaking in is not an option. I'm talking about a back door made of metal steel with a lock with a combination of 100 numbers.
From the movie Step Up, in times when you don't know what to do to get what you want the director says, 'You have to show me...' and when you're finally taking action, 'I'm fighting for something real for the first time in my life'
I'm doing that. But nothing worked, and it still ain't. I'm talking about me wracking my brains, running up and down with 20 bags in hand, panting in the hot sun, staring at the computer till my eyes hurt. Guess it wasn't enough. Whatever I do won't be enough.
What do I do now?
Now that I'm no longer with 987 it seems weird. Very weird. Feeling kinda lost actually. It's just such a sudden change. From early mornings, running around places, days fully planned... to absolutely no plans, no work, nothing.
Yeap... am not a part of 987 anymore. I never was.
I'm not too sure why they didn't keep me. Maybe cos' I suck... I suck... and I suck. That's wack!
Been watching Heroes. I've got episodes 1 to 13. And it's been an awesome show.
Does everyone really have an ability to make a difference in the world? I've always wanted to save the world. But I know I can't do it alone. But sadly, I'm always alone. And in times of desperate measures, I don't have a choice but to go with it. On. My. Own.
In every lifetime, there'll definitely be someone who stands out. Someone who can do something different and unique, touching lives and changing destiny. What can I do? What am I meant to do?
I've been asking myself. What do I want to do in my life. What do I want to spend the rest of my life doing. I then realized... I don't have an answer. I used to have. Now I've lost it.
I feel like I'm just living my life for the sake of living it. The feeling sucks. I can't seem to find myself back.
I know I can do great things. I can make a difference. Just like the special ones in Heroes. I can change time, I can use my mind to move things, I can not feel the pain, I can become someone else... I can do many things.
I can be a great DJ, I can make it big, I can be the one who stand out, I can be someone worth so much, I can be a script writer, I can be a journalist.... Why can't I do that? Cos' no one's gonna give me the chance to prove it. And no one will believe me.
Confidence dipping by a landslide, losing the ability to think... I turn to the TV for answers, hoping that it'll somehow change the way my mind's thinking.
From the movie Honey, 'Sometimes you have to get in through the back door first if you wanna get in through the front'
I'm doing that. But even the back door's locked now. And breaking in is not an option. I'm talking about a back door made of metal steel with a lock with a combination of 100 numbers.
From the movie Step Up, in times when you don't know what to do to get what you want the director says, 'You have to show me...' and when you're finally taking action, 'I'm fighting for something real for the first time in my life'
I'm doing that. But nothing worked, and it still ain't. I'm talking about me wracking my brains, running up and down with 20 bags in hand, panting in the hot sun, staring at the computer till my eyes hurt. Guess it wasn't enough. Whatever I do won't be enough.
What do I do now?
Less than 10 inches tall
Posted on: Monday, February 05, 2007
Posted at: 5:02 PM
Posted at: 5:02 PM
Patience is a virtue
How long do I have to wait?
Before you're mine
I'm still waiting for you to open that big golden gate
Time goes tick tock
After all his time
Have I been more than that girl
That does what you say without a dime
Everytime you guys go
I'm always left behind
It hurts right there
At the spot that needs to unwind
I've never been part of you
Saying goodbye is easy
but not for me
I've been nothing but the fool
You don't even have the guts to tell it to my face
I gave you your space
You still aren't that man I knew
You just dried up like the morning dew
What you said plays over and over again
In my head it won't fade away
It hurts so bad
You'll never understand the pains I had
When I first saw you
You were ten feet tall
Now I see you
You're less than 10 inches tall
How long do I have to wait?
Before you're mine
I'm still waiting for you to open that big golden gate
Time goes tick tock
After all his time
Have I been more than that girl
That does what you say without a dime
Everytime you guys go
I'm always left behind
It hurts right there
At the spot that needs to unwind
I've never been part of you
Saying goodbye is easy
but not for me
I've been nothing but the fool
You don't even have the guts to tell it to my face
I gave you your space
You still aren't that man I knew
You just dried up like the morning dew
What you said plays over and over again
In my head it won't fade away
It hurts so bad
You'll never understand the pains I had
When I first saw you
You were ten feet tall
Now I see you
You're less than 10 inches tall